I saw it today...

I have known that Ty is behind in his gross motor skills. I have seen pictures of this thin baby upon entering the orphanage, and then very skinny post-lip surgery. At 16 months old, he was just learning to walk holding on to things. I am guessing, from what I can put together with pictures and information, he was walking independently at 18 months, which would be last December.

We got him in August at 26 months of age. So he's been an independent walker for 8 months. I'm not sure what is supposed to happen in those 8 months, but I can tell you what didn't happen. Ty did not gain the needed weight to become a healthy toddler. Don't get me wrong, Tyson's orphanage took great care of him. He is sharp, as I have said before. Maybe these are problem solving skills from mere survival, I don't know, but his problem solving and cognitive skills are intact. Speech issues are a given, I don't even bring that up because Tyson has already over come that with signing. I communicate with him just as well, if not better, than many parents with 2 year olds who have grown up in the US. But nutritionally, he's low on the growth charts still, even after gaining 5 pounds. For his height, his weight is perfect! (33 inches, 27 pounds), but that is the size of a 19 month old at 50th %ile.

So back to gross motor skills. Tyson just recently started running. However, I recently began noticing the things he can't do, rather than what he can do. This entire time I have focused on what he can do and what he's learning. But now I am seeing where we need to get to. That's what I saw today.

I took Ty to Busy Town, a place where little ones can play at our local YMCA. I think this place will be a 3x a week play area for us. It has many things that Ty needs to become stronger and healthier. We all agree, nutrition is going to play a huge role in Ty's ability to gain muscles. So while we were there, there were VERY agressive boys, not overly aggressive, just typical boys I guess, ages 2-4 absolutely running circles around Tyson. Ty looked like a baby....like a....well....an 18 month old. I saw how very behind my child is in Gross Motor Skills.

So here is what I'm choosing to do. Up until he has his surgery, we're going to play, and play, and play! We're going to dance, walk, run, move and groove. People know that when I'm on a mission, I don't stop. So now that the dust has settled, I see where our focus needs to be. It's not speech, it's not language, and it's not behavior or sleep. It's physical movement. And boy, we're going to have fun doing it! We will make up for that lost time...it may take a few years, but we're going to get there.

Birth to 3 meeting and plan

Before leaving for China, I made the necessary contacts and appointments to get Tyson evaluated for birth-3 intervention. This is also known as EI in the adoption community since every state is a little different. I don't mind sharing this info because I know so many of you wonder how it all works. I am a teacher, so the process didn't scare me at all, but I know for others you don't know where to start or what it entails.

When we returned from China, an Early Childhood coordinator came to our house to do a developmental screening. She was looking for areas that Ty might qualify for needing interventions. She identified adaptive, gross motor, and speech, and language.

About 1.5 weeks later, we went to the preschool and the speech therapist and a teacher evaluated him further in those areas. He did not qualify under language at all because he communicates well. The other areas he did qualify under the further evaluation.

Fast forward another 2.5 weeks to today. The way the plan is written is based on where he was then, but now he may not need the adaptive intervention, but we left it there anyway (feeding self, getting dressed, etc...). Gross motor is still a major concern and huge delay, even though he has learned to run since our initial visits. As for speech, I had to self report everything, so until his palate is fixed, we won't know what his plan will be, but there will be one.

There are so many ways to get intervention, and each child is different. For Ty, we decided to wait on Speech until after palate surgery, and because I'm home, I'm going to continue working on his adaptive and gross motor skills with a therapist who will do monthly home visits to help monitor his progress and give me ideas. This plan may not work for everyone, and even I admit that once I go back to work, that's where the therapists will really help. I have an early childhood background and feel comfortable working in these areas with Ty. I have my own little plan of what I want to do with him as part of his "therapy" which at this age is just play, but having an intentional plan of goals and skills that I have in mind.

After palate surgery and Christmas break, Ty will begin the 2 year old preschool 2x a week, where he will get his therapies. I like this plan because it takes into account his need to continue bonding with me and not make him have so many transitions at one time.

For those thinking that this is a scary process, let me assure you, it's not! Or at least, it shouldn't be. And if it is, learn your rights quickly, because you have them! I learned the hard way two years ago, as a parent, you are sometimes going to be your child's only advocate.

So I'm happy with the plan, and all are happy with Ty's progress. Gross motor and speech will be the areas of concern for quite some time. But as he gains weight and gets healthier, it will all come together.

Adoption vs Pregnancy comments

Pregnancy and Adoption: I've done both, and neither were typical. I am writing this out of some frustration about comments I read from people and what people say. Not to me directly--I am so very fortunate. I don't hear the "You signed up for this" or "We told you so". I just don't get those comments. Maybe people keep it to themselves because they know I have a voice and will use it. But some of my friends in the adoption community do get these comments, and sadly, sometimes from fellow adoptive parents.

Let me address the "You signed up for this" and "Be prepared for the worst case scenario" comments regarding special needs adoption. Most of us who adopt sn from China do get some sort of "surprise" diagnosis once home. We know this can happen and we research and prepare for what maybe to come. For Ty, I researched microcephaly (due to head circumference, which is fine praise God!) and syndromes related to cleft lip/palate. I was willing to take these on.

But often medical issues are so blatently obvious, it's frustrating that it wasn't in the referral paperwork. Unforeseen diagnosis I think are the ones we deal with in stride. OK yes, China's medical system isn't what we have here . But to miss things that are so obvious? So some parents say, "You should have been prepared." These comments have an undertone of, you shouldn't be upset, you should have known. You took the chance.

When I was pregnant with Kacie, my water broke at 35 weeks, and Kacie's lungs were not developed. She was transported to a NICU, and my world was shattered. But no one said to me, "Well, when you got pregnant, you should have been prepared for the worst case scenario. You should have known, after all, you signed up for this pregnancy." No one said that! Everyone was empathetic and supportive.

So why is that that when we adopt a child with special needs, there is this attitude of "You should have know there'd be more..." When this is not the attitude when something veers off the path of a regular pregnancy and childbirth?

I'm not even sure how to wrap this up...maybe just to remind people to have some sensitivity.

Just my thoughts today.

Baby Shower

Wow is all I can say. My friends gave me a wonderful baby shower tonight, and we are truly blessed. Many of these things I wanted to buy for Tyson, yet I'm watching our dollars a little closer now that it's looking like I may be taking a chunk of time off unpaid since we still do not have a surgery date yet. Outdoor toys, bath toys, clothes...oh my!

My wonderful friends who gave this shower: L, T, T, and K, you know who you are, and you are gems. I praise God that whether I've known you 12 years or less than 12 months, God brought you into my life for a reason, and I am honored to call all of you my friends! Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts. Dan was truly overwhelmed when T.R. pulled up with all the stuff in her vehicle.

I also need to thank K and H for stocking our refrigerator when we returned from China. I hope that those reading this will have the fortunate experience of arriving home from China to planned dinners. It was a life saver!

So many people have prayed for us and for Tyson. Every week on our prayer card at church we pretty much wrote the same thing: "Please pray that Tyson is growing and healthy." Well, we couldn't have asked for more, and we know it's because of the prayers of at least 5 churches that I can name, plus more I'm sure that I'm not aware of. Particularly my church, Harbor City Church, prayed vigilantly for 11 months for Tyson.

God has given us a miracle in our son. I left my house at 6:00 tonight and got home after 9:00pm. I missed his bedtime. I miss Tyson! I just want to go wake him up and hold him. I might sneak in and watch him sleep. That is how much I love this little boy. So just as a little child would do who is excited for the following day, I will go to bed and make the night go faster so I can see Tyson sooner!

Kacie and Tyson--what a pair!

Do I even need to write anything? I think the pictures say it all.

Home one month!

Wow...I'm not sure if it feels like we've been home a week, a month, or a year. On one hand, it seems like we just got back from China. Yet on the otherhand, we've done so much in the last 4 weeks, it feels more like a year! But mostly, it feels like Ty has always been here, and that is great!

Our issues with Tyson are becoming less about adoption and more about just being two. He is learning as many signs as I can teach him. I wish his little fingers could do more specific signs because he's trying to say his colors (the only understandable one is yellow) but I can't understand him, and he can't make the signs either. So I was asking him to give me a certain color and showing him the sign, but we were just being too silly and having fun. Yesterday he gave me the sign for shoes, and so I told him to go get them, and he did, and he wanted outside. He walked to his stroller, so off we went on a little walk, and I taught him the sign for bird, and we looked for birds. Today when we walked Kacie to the bus stop, he could hear them, and he was making the sign for bird! Amazing... but everyday is like this.

Bed time is getting better, but last night was a regression. However, I think we overcame it. In fact, after he ate lunch today, he grabbed my hand and walked back to his room with me and told me "Night Night". He knows, after lunch is nap! Granted, he cried when I put him in bed, but he knows the routine and accepts it. I'm sure that's how it was in the orphanage.

Speaking of orphanage, let's talk about that. I'd really like to know how the orphanage and the doctors "missed" Tyson's second cleft in his lip. I'd like to know why that red mark does not show up in referral photos. It's not there, at all. But in all my early photos of Ty from HTS, even before lip repair, the red mark from the microform cleft lip is there. I'm baffled.

Tyson has gained almost 5 pounds since being home. He is now running. In fact, this morning he chose to run with his sippy cup in the kitchen (water is always available to Ty) and he tripped and the cup cut his gums. I picked him up and didn't know it right away until after holding him for 30 seconds while he screamed, I pulled him away and saw blood all over his lips and blood on my shoulder. No worries, I got a washcloth, cleaned him up, and three minutes later he was playing again.

Tyson is now walking in public...wait no...running in public! He really likes the long hallway at our church. As we were waiting for Jie Jie (Kacie) to get done with her Wed night Kids' Church, he was running down that hall laughing with delight. My friend Lori was teaching and her door wasn't shut all the way....THUD!! All doors close when Ty is around. Does anyone have any insight on this? Is this an orphanage/adoption thing, or just a kid who really likes to close doors?

Last Sunday we had Tyson's baby dedication. This is when as parents we dedicate Tyson's life to God and we vow to raise him with Christian values and beliefs. It is so nice to know that we have a church family right there backing us up. In the pictures on stage are Dan's mom and step dad. On the floor on the left is my group that meets every week on Sunday nights and my friend Lori, and on the left are my good friends as well. All of these people have prayed for us and with us, and we consider them church family. As you can see, Tyson went to Pastor Doug for a second...and that was about it. But the good news there is that Ty wanted his daddy. Ty is going to both parents evenly now. For those parents out there who are going through what we did in regards to Ty choosing one parent over the other, we know it's hard. But our experience has shown that it does work itself out.

We have been blessed beyond words with the addition Tyson to our family. "Ty Ty" "Ty-man" "Tyson the Tornado" all those fun names--they are all the same little boy. He's funny, smart, cute, stubborn, adventurous, and loving. He's all we ever wanted, and I tear up when I think about how this could have all played out, but God gave us a little boy. A typical little boy...who could ask for more?

First Cleft Team Appt.

Long story short, it was a good day with a surprise diagnosis. We met with a cleft pediatrician, nutritionist, social worker, cleft surgeon, orthodontist, and 2 nurses--one did measurements at the beginning, and one who wraps up the appointment at the end. A photographer also took pictures of Ty so we can document his progress. All seemed happy with Tyson's health and glad that he's progressing and gaining weight. He has almost gained 5 pounds in the month we've had him! We realize he will lose a few pounds after surgery, so we are just going to continue our current meal routine with a few minor tweaks just to make things even better.

It's important to know that all of Tyson's paperwork report a unilateral cleft lip and palate, . That means that the cleft was only on one side, in Ty's case the left side. Last night I was looking at Tyson's referral photos. I noticed that his "scar" was on his right. So how does that work when the cleft was on the left? I never put much thought into it. I had noticed it before, but never compared it to the photos. But what do I know about surgeries?

So today the surgeon looked at him and at first was confused too. Then he realized that Tyson actually has a bilateral cleft lip, unilateral cleft gumline and palate. The "scar" on the right is actually a microform cleft lip. Joaquin Phoenix has this. The doctor told us all about it, and it is not a big deal at all, just a surprise. Down the road, we can have surgery on this to make the microform side less visible. But for now, we just put that info aside, as we first need to focus on the palate. The one thing I need to do still is to go examine the few baby pictures of Ty that I have to see if this is in fact the case. I was kicking myself for not taking those with us to the appointment, but I did have the referral medical paperwork, and the surgeon appreciated that.

We hope to have a surgery date this week. We will visit ENT (ear, nose, throat doctor), and have his speech and hearing assessed on October 5th. Tyson did pretty well. He walked around the hospital like he owned the place. He did well in the room (all the doctors came to us!), and even figured out how to open and close the door. The ride home didn't go so great. He was tired and uncomfortable, and who could blame him. We had our first meal out since China, and I didn't like it. I am still very tired of eating out!

So that's it! We also had Tyson's baby dedication yesterday. Pictures to come soon!

Cleft Appt today

We are off to Seattle for Ty's cleft appts. There are 7 appts total, everything from nurses, doctors, social worker, nutritionist, surgeons... We don't even see ENT/Speech/Hearing for another two weeks. I will update tomorrow how it goes, as we won't get home until late. We live about 3 hours from the hospital.

Your prayers would appreciated. Thank you!
Jolene

The new parenting plan

Week three at home proved to be pivotal. Last Sunday and Monday, I was exhausted. I didn't know how I could possibly parent Ty, an adopted toddler from China with a wide open cleft palate. When you put it like that, it seems insurmountable. The 45 min to 1.5 hour bedside backrubs at nap and bed time, the throwing of food and dishes, and the tantrums...I wasn't sure how much longer I could do this without losing my mind. Other than these things, Ty was truly a wonderfully funny and sweet little boy.

On Monday, something happened. I think sometimes we confuse "bonding" with "spoiling". I knew I had to start using boundaries. Some may disagree, but Ty is attaching to Dan and I wonderfully, and I don't want a child who controls our every move and puts a divide within our family. So the play pen came out to the living room for "time outs". 1-2 minutes.

The first two days were a killer. I felt like the world's meanest mom, and I questioned everything I did. Yes, I know the research on attachment. But also know what it means to have a spoiled kid...I have worked with several over the last 12 years! By the end of Monday, I was seeing results. Ty understands cause and effect. I saw it over and over in China. On Tuesday, I had a migraine...a bad one. But I continued my efforts.

1. If Ty threw himself on the ground, he went to the play pen. This was not only for a consequence, but his own safety.

2. If Ty refused to walk, he went to time out. You may disagree, and that's OK. I am putting this out there to let parents know IT'S OK to impose boundaries. My back cannot deal with picking up a toddler 50+ times a day. You think I'm exaggerating...I'm not.

3. When I go to the playpen to get him from Time out, I put out my arms. If he refuses to get up, I walk away. in 30-60 seconds, I come back. Sometimes he gets up, sometimes he doesn't. But more often lately, he gets up. Again, consistency is the key.

4. When I get him out, I hug him while he stands on the floor. This took training. I bend down and hug him. Sometimes I sit down and hug him and let him sit on my lap, but I do not pick him up. Trust me, I pick him up plenty of times throughout the day, but he needs to know that I have needs. I have to use the bathroom, and no, he can't sit on my lap. I have to cook breakfast, and no, I'm not going to hold him over hot water.

5. He then must walk with me holding my hand. This took 6 times in a row of playpen times on Monday/Tuesday (not sure which day...migraines blur my memory). But when he finally walked, he got his snack, which is what was next in the routine. Now, he walks holding my hand.

6. For sleep, I stay with him 15 minutes. Then I check on him every 5-10-15 min. I cut out the 5 min check, and usually he is asleep before 10 min. And it's not even a cry, it's whine. When we tell him "Time to go night night", he understands because his lower lip sticks out a mile. It's so pathetic it is adorable. I cannot continue to use 1-3 hours of my day putting him to sleep. I also realized I was actually keeping him awake staying in there. What actually happened a few nights was that Kacie needed me, and I had to leave Ty for a few minutes. That's how it all started. Guess what? He survived, bedtime is much easier now, and he still loves me. Two out 3 nights he sleeps all the way through the night in his toddler bed. Life is good.

When I said this week was pivotal, this is why. Ty is happier during the day. Much happier! Which then means, WE are happier! Thursday night we all were sitting in the living room, and we realized, we are going to be OK. We are starting to resemble a "normal" family, but we know we'll never be "normal". But Ty is our son, and our parenting is transitioning from parenting an adopted toddler to parenting a two-year old. We aren't hearing the screaming grieving cry anymore. Instead, we hear the "I'm ticked off" cry or whimper.

But here's the biggest difference. I find myself consulting with my friends with bio 2-year olds, and not as much my adoptive friends for advice. On Wednesday I learned that many of Ty's behaviors are just two year old behaviors. The adoption will always be there, of course. The cleft palate will always be there, even when fixed. But beyond that, and more importantly, he is OUR SON! He is a member of our family, and I am so glad that we were able to begin treating him that way. I have to keep high expectations of him, or I am letting him down. And I know we're being successful because his tantrums are less, our bonding is better, and we are all happier.

I hope this helps someone out there. I'm not saying I'm right, but I will say that after getting through those difficult days of imposing boundaries and expectations, my son is better off for it. We are all better off!

Oh, and I can't say enough about Baby Signs. Ty wants to communicate so bad, and the signs have really aided in communication. If you are adopting a child with cleft lip/palate, I highly recommend baby sign language.

New pics coming soon! You won't believe the difference in Ty's chubby cheeks! He's amazing.

Parenting a two year old...wow!

Don't read this if you're a permissive parent! You won't like it.

Up until Monday, I was parenting a child who was recently adopted. I put up with the tantrums, attributing them to grieving, anxiety, etc... I had begun to set some boundries, but not consistently. I picked him up when he cried, let him eat way too much, etc... but I realized I am creating a monster. While I needed to parent this way in order to build trust and bonding, I can't continue this. As much as we've bent over backward to fit into Tyson's world, it's time for him to bend our way a little.

Those of you who know Ty know that he is smart. Darn smart. A friend of mine told me that Ty is going to take advantage of every inconsistency, and you know, she's right.

So on Monday, I began parenting a two year old, and it was not easy. Boundaries are never easy. But most people are impressed that I do have him sleeping in a toddler bed. My response to that is that no, it was not easy, and it still isn't easy putting him to sleep all the time, but it is the way it is. He adapts. He sleeps through the night, and if he does wait, it's a quick 15 min to get him back to sleep. So he will learn to adapt to our boundaries, and here's why: if he doesn't, his mom will go crazy, and maybe his daycare won't take him.

I haven't decided on a daycare yet. It's still up in the air, as there are pros and cons to the two I am considering. I know that daycares deal with kids who have anxiety about parental separation, but are those daycares ready for Ty, who won't let me sweep the floor without flopping on the floor screaming, only to break out in a smile the moment I walk over to him or pick him up?? Will they take him? Is he going to scream all day? I also know that he is actually crying for boundaries...it's another story, but I've seen it. He wants to know what is acceptable and what isn't.

I never know what behavior I'm seeing. Is the behavior due to adoption or just being 2 years old? I spoke with two friends this morning, both who have kids in school. I have noticed that Ty is most needy and upset when Kacie leaves for school and Dan is at work. When we are all home, he's happy. Otherwise, he is on my heels or wants held all the time. I thought it was adoption behavior, but come to find out, my friends' kids do this too! Their husbands go to work, and their older kids go to school, and the younger ones cling to their mamas. I'm not going to say that the adoption isn't part of it, I'd be remiss if I did. But it is reassuring to know that Tyson is doing what other kids do too. This SAHM gig is new to me too, in addition to having an older child who goes off to school leaving the younger one home.

We'll get through it, by the grace of God, we'll be OK.

Pictures from Saturday

Once again, we learned something new about Tyson. Evidently, he can hold a pencil correctly! As a teacher, I about fell over. He barely understood what a crayon was and gripped it with his fist, but give the kid a pencil, and he'll write all over--walls, floor, cupboards, etc... So yesterday's phrase was, "Pencils write on paper," about 100 times.

He also figured out how to stack his cups! He was pretty proud of that. And then when I was done with the dishes, once again, he brought over his stacking cups and sippy cup and "loaded" the dishwasher for me. I sure hope he still loves to do this in about 8 years! LOL!

We still have our rough moments, but these moments make it all worth while. He fits into our family so perfectly.

***Sorry I always post the pictures backward! After all this time, I'm still learning!

Typical Tyson at home

He is not like this when other people are at my house or if we are out in public. So this is an outsider's glimpse into Tyson's World!

Things are looking up!

We've been home two weeks, and things are looking up! We still have our moments around food and sleep, but it's getting so much better. Here are some highlights:

Today Ty strung two words together: "Hello Mama!" It melted my heart. I decided right then and there, he can do no wrong. Ever.

He had a screening for early intervention services, which he qualifies for under physical disability due to the cleft palate and will require speech therapy. It was clear that he did not qualify under cognitive skills. He's very bright, curious, and has good problem solving skills. And get this, he does not qualify under LANGUAGE! Yes, you read that right. (For those who don't know, speech is different than language). The therapist and teacher were very impressed with his ability to say "No" and use his signs for communicating. He imitates everything I say the best he can. He will get help with gross motor as well.

Tonight I showed him how to put his bowl in the sink after his snack. So after his bottle I said, "Go put your bottle in the sink," and he did! I could give many other examples like that.

He is just a happy boy at night. He has a hard time in the morning, and I think I realized that he struggles because Kacie and Dan are gone. He's used to having people around doting on him. When it's just he and I, I have to prepare his meals and take care of the pets, and take care of myself. He likes to have 100% attention. So we'll get through it. It's not that bad, but there are definitely more fits thrown before the first nap than after, when everyone is home.

So here is a video from today. Just a day in the life, more or less. Enjoy!
***I tried to load it, but it won't load. I'll try again tomorrow!

Our cup runneth over, literally!

Part of having a child with cleft palate is that sippy cups are used without the stoppers. Part of transitioning Tyson from his food to regular playtime is using a water cup. We need it less and less now, but there are still times we need it, like after morning snack. So here's what I saw today! What a creative little boy... that's my kid! And my floor is really clean now.

He Dances!

We've had Ty for 3 weeks, and I have yet to see him dance. I've seen him bob his head side to side while walking, but not to music. I have a hard time believing that they didn't let the kids dance in his orphanage. But it was one of the developmental screening questions last week, and it had me concerned. I know he can hear music. Kacie was watching Kung Fu Panda last night, and when the Chinese music came on, he became very aware, and he stopped and listened.

So this morning, he was playing with a toy guitar, and Kacie came to me saying, "Mom, he's dancing! He's bouncing up and down!" So I grabbed my flip, and I was able to record a little bit of it.

We went to church yesterday with Ty. He was pretty overwhelmed, but he did great overall. He fell asleep on the way home, and evidently he considered that his nap because I tried for 1.5 hours to put him down for a nap after lunch, but he wasn't having it. So I got to deal with a grumpy Ty all night. But the good news is that he slept from 8:30pm to 7:00am, and he just went down for a nap at 12:10, and it only took me 10 minutes to get him to go to sleep!

Like I said before, he shows us a little more of his personality everyday. I love him so much. He's perfect in everyway.

Breakfast, Big Sister, Big Dog, Busy Morning

A week before bring Ty home, we got an update and learned that Ty did not use utensils. Not because he lacked the ability, but because the nannies fed him. It was lack of opportunity. I love feeding Ty. It's a special time, and we have lots of fun. But with food such an issue, I need to get a bite in too and I try to be done when he is so he doesn't want my food too. It's getting better, but the issue is not gone and probably will take a long time to get over, if ever. So I began teaching him to use a spoon.

So this morning while feeding him I had to get up for a minute, and look who dug in! He still lets me feed him, but at the same time, I need to honor his need for independence while balancing his desire for dependence on me. It's a fine line, that's for sure!

A few days ago, before we knew it, Kacie scooped Ty up and headed to the back yard with him. She led him around by the hand, showing him around. She took the time to help him pet Koby, our yellow lab, and realize Koby is just a big gentle giant. Ty still doesn't like Koby's tongue, but Ty will now walk up to Koby and pet her! What a great big sister Kacie is! She is at grandma's now, but she misses Ty so much, she called 3 times today to check on him.

And as a side note, Ty's dr. appt went fine. It was just a well child check up for the doctor to get to know him and do a general check up, and he's healthy! We knew that. Our doctor couldn't believe that cleft palate was a special need. Oh, and all that worrying was for nothing and the prayers paid off. Ty's head is in the 32nd %ile! He weighed 24 pounds 3 oz and was 34 inches tall. I think the height is wrong...but for sure he has stubby legs and a long body.

Then we went to my school where my teaching partners from last year were lesson planning. We crashed their party so they could meet Ty, and I was so glad we stopped by. We were home by 1o:45, but Ty was getting tired already. I can't believe the busy days we put him through in China! Now just a few outings wear him out. No wonder he was crabby!

Sleep issues continue...but I think I saw light!

If the other night was horrid, then last night was beyond horrific! I won't even begin to tell all the strategies we tried with Ty. From 9:30 to 12:30...he cried, he played, he screamed, he played, he wiggled, he sat up, he tore thing off his walls for fun, etc... We finally put him in bed with us, and we slept from 1 to 8am.

Today he napped from 12:30 to 2:30, his earliest nap yet and closest to a schedule yet! Bedtime went so much better. We started at 8:35, and he was asleep by 9:20. Would have been earlier, but the phone rang twice! Ugh! I think early naps are key.

Daytime has been getting better and better. He met Dan's family tonight, and it went great. He walked in the house and even separated from me for a bit to be with Dan and his mom and sister. Progress! He did have a meltdown when he was standing by me while I was eating (he ate first, then yes, he let me eat in front of him!), and I just stood up to take my plate to the sink. He just sunk to the ground and screamed, and hit his head on a table leg in the process. But that was it. He was happy and smiling the whole time.

We then stopped at teh grocery store...Ty's first time. "Ohhhhhhh!!!!!!!" He said! Now he knows where we get our food! LOL!

He is trying so hard to talk! If we say hello to him, he says it back. If I say, "Ty Ty," He says, "Yeah" back! He says hi and bye (bye sounds like mah) and waves. He LOVES the phone. Tonight I asked him where his nose was, and he pointed to it! We started that yesterday. He is using the sign for more very well, and he's trying other signs as we use them.

Well, tomorrow is a ped. appt. Just a check up with an American doctor. I am not looking forward to the upcoming dr. appts, but I guess it is what it is. He's beautiful and perfect to me!

Jolene

A horrid night, a wonderful day, and more pictures!

Since Dan didn't work this morning, we decided that since I hadn't slept more than 2-3 hours a night, I would take some Tylenol PM, and Dan would tend to Ty when he woke up.

Yeah. Didn't work out so well.

Ty screamed and cried, even with Dan right there with him. He calmed down a few times and almost fell asleep, but as soon as Dan would get in bed, Ty would scream again. So after 2.5 hours of this up and down stuff, I got out of bed. I told Dan to let me try. I put one hand on Ty's head and one on his back, and Ty immediately stopped crying. Now I wish I could tell you I got him to sleep. Oh, no way. Another 1.5 hours later, he fell asleep. Keep in mind, I had taken Tylenol PM. I felt drugged, weary, and just awful. I did get to sleep from 4am to 9am, so 5 hours in one night was better than 5 hours in two nights.

So after that horrid night, we all got up late to start our day. We had Ty's first developmental screening at our house. Many of the milestones we couldn't comment on due to language, such as points to body parts. But he did great for fine motor, and he demonstrated great problem solving ability. He his social/emotional was good, but his sleep problems made his score go up. If you took out the sleep issues, he's adjusting very well. It was fun to get an outside professional view, and she gave me some good ideas. She mentioned pushing a cart. I totally forgot about Kacie's old plastic shopping cart! It doesn't go on the carpet well, but we got it out and he's having a blast with it in the kitchen.

He "helped" me put dishes in the dishwasher! I was putting away glasses, and the next thing I knew, he was putting his stacking cups in. We took him on his first walk down our road. We got out the stroller, and he lit up like a Christmas tree. We also had some playtime outside, more swinging, and then a late nap.

Tonight after his bath, I was wishing I had a hooded towel. I said it outloud, and here came Kacie with her old disney princess towel! Now I know I said no pink, but this was just too funny! We all laughed, and Ty was not impressed. He knew something wasn't right. After I lotioned him all up, he ran away laughing. We let him play for a bit in his diaper. I'm guessing he's never done that before.

Tonight he pet both of dogs on his own. He still doesn't like Koby's tongue (yellow lab), but progress is being made.

And the best news: He has gained 2 pounds! Praise the Lord!